Outsmarting the spite

יבמות דף סג ע"א 

רב הוה קא מצערא ליה דביתהו כי אמר לה עבידי לי טלופחי עבדא ליה חימצי חימצי עבדא ליה טלופחי כי גדל חייא בריה אפיך לה אמר ליה איעליא לך אמך אמר ליה אנא הוא דקא אפיכנא לה אמר ליה היינו דקא אמרי אינשי דנפיק מינך טעמא מלפך את לא תעביד הכי שנאמר (ירמיהו ט) למדו לשונם דבר שקר 

Yevamot 63a 

Rav would get tormented by his wife. Whatever he would ask of her, she would spitefully do the opposite. If he would ask for lentil soup, he would get chimtzi beans. If he would ask for chimtzi beans, he would get lentils. 

One day, he found that she had made lentils, just like he had requested! 

"Your mother finally stopped mistreating me!" he happily told his son Chiya.

"Actually..." Chiya said, "I told Mom that you want chimtzi beans today. I knew she would switch it on you and you would get the dinner you were actually craving."

"That's what they mean when they say, 'That which you produce is more capable than you are.' However, you must stop. It is, after all, dishonest to trick your mother like that. One must never use dishonest means for getting what he wants, lest it becomes a habit."

Sometimes in life, we find that we can outsmart people's hurtful behavior by lowering ourselves to their standards. However, A"A demonstrates from this gemara, this is not the correct approach. We must maintain our standard of behavior at all times, even when dealing with spiteful spouses and other unpleasantness.