Shemuel and the Portable Bathroom

בכורות דף מד ע"ב 

שמואל איצטריך ליה בשבתא דרגלא נגדו ליה גלימא אתא לקמיה דאבוה א"ל אתן לך ד' מאה זוזי וזיל אהדר עובדא את דאפשר לך דלא אפשר ליה ליסתכן מר בר רב אשי איצטריך אגודא גמלא אשתין אמרו ליה חמתך קאתיא אמר להו באודנה

Bechorot 44b 

Shemuel needed to use the bathroom, so his talmidim spread out their jackets and created a divider to provide privacy for him. 

When his father heard about the incident, he said: "I would give you four hundred zuz to go take back what you've done! Announce in public that it is forbidden to wait until you have privacy before urinating. You see, for you it's easy. You have talmidim at your beck and call who will provide you with a divider whenever you need. But what about those who don't have access to that kind of luxury? They will hold it in until they can find a private spot, and it will cause damage to their urogenital tract!"  

Today, a certain talmid chacham approached A"A with a question regarding carrying a cell phone on Shabbat in a case of pikuach nefesh. A"A permitted it. The talmid chacham recommended a gimmick to avoid some of the issur- if the carrier places the cell phone in a bag with something that is not muktze, perhaps he can establish the bag as a basis ledavar hammutar and permit the muktze of the phone! A"A forbade him from making this recommendation. 

"If you add conditions to make it 'extra permissible'," He told the inquirer, "people may mistakenly believe that it is only muttar under these conditions. This might lead them to abandon the actual halacha when your gimmick is unavailable or not being used. And that in turn may lead to pikuach nefesh." 

He proved his stance from this gemara- it is forbidden to add chumrot in such a situation, lest someone else misunderstand, mistakenly believe that the chumra is a necessity, and fail to keep the din properly.

Outsmarting the spite

יבמות דף סג ע"א 

רב הוה קא מצערא ליה דביתהו כי אמר לה עבידי לי טלופחי עבדא ליה חימצי חימצי עבדא ליה טלופחי כי גדל חייא בריה אפיך לה אמר ליה איעליא לך אמך אמר ליה אנא הוא דקא אפיכנא לה אמר ליה היינו דקא אמרי אינשי דנפיק מינך טעמא מלפך את לא תעביד הכי שנאמר (ירמיהו ט) למדו לשונם דבר שקר 

Yevamot 63a 

Rav would get tormented by his wife. Whatever he would ask of her, she would spitefully do the opposite. If he would ask for lentil soup, he would get chimtzi beans. If he would ask for chimtzi beans, he would get lentils. 

One day, he found that she had made lentils, just like he had requested! 

"Your mother finally stopped mistreating me!" he happily told his son Chiya.

"Actually..." Chiya said, "I told Mom that you want chimtzi beans today. I knew she would switch it on you and you would get the dinner you were actually craving."

"That's what they mean when they say, 'That which you produce is more capable than you are.' However, you must stop. It is, after all, dishonest to trick your mother like that. One must never use dishonest means for getting what he wants, lest it becomes a habit."

Sometimes in life, we find that we can outsmart people's hurtful behavior by lowering ourselves to their standards. However, A"A demonstrates from this gemara, this is not the correct approach. We must maintain our standard of behavior at all times, even when dealing with spiteful spouses and other unpleasantness. 

Double dipping

נדרים דף מט ע"ב

רבי יוסי ורבי יהודה חד אכיל דייסא באצבעתיה וחד אכיל בהוצא א"ל דאכיל בהוצא לדאכיל באצבעתיה עד מתי אתה מאכילני צואתך אמר ליה דאכיל באצבעתיה לדאכיל בהוצא עד מתי אתה מאכילני רוקך

Nedarim 49b

Ribbi Yosse and Ribbi Yehuda had a difference of habit when sharing a bowl of cereal: one would eat it with his hands and the other would use a spoon. 

"For how long must I endure being fed the dirt off your hands?!" the spoon-eater said to the hand-eater.

"You're one to speak!" the hand-eater replied. "I see you double dipping with that spoon. For how long must I endure being fed your saliva?"