Thursday, February 16, 2017

Handsome soldiers and crucified prisoners

תוספות קידושין דף פ ע"ב ד"ה כי ההוא מעשה
מעשה באשה אחת שהיתה בוכה ומתאוננת על קבר בעלה והיה שם אדם אחד שהיה שומר תלוי אחד וצוה לו המלך לשומרו ובא אצל האשה ופיתה אותה ושמעה לו וכשחזר אצל התלוי לא מצאו והיה מצטער מאד מפחד המלך אמרה לו האשה "אל תירא קח בעלי מקברו ותלהו במקומו" ואפיקתיה לבעלה ותלהו. הרי לך שאפילו בשעת אנינות נתגבר יצרה עליה

Tosafot Kiddushin 80b 

Once upon a time, there was a woman crying over the fresh grave of her recently deceased husband. Nearby, a Roman soldier was on guard-duty watching a crucified prisoner. The two exchanged nervous glances, began flirting, and ended up running off to spend the night together.
After returning to his post, the soldier found that his crucified prisoner had gone missing.
"Oh no!" he declared. "The captain will have my head for this!"
"Don't worry," his new acquaintance comforted him, "Just dig up my husband and put his body up on the cross instead. Nobody will know the difference!"

I don't think A"A has ever showed us a more disturbing story in the Talmud than this one. I feel shivers down my spine every time he tells it over. Between the grieving wife running off with a Roman soldier, the missing crucified prisoner, and the exhumed husband, it is difficult to pinpoint which part of this story is truly most horrifying. 

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