Introductory Statement

אבות ה:טו

ארבע מידות ביושבי לפני חכמים--ספוג, ומשפך, משמרת, ונפה:  ספוג, שהוא סופג את הכול; משפך--שהוא מכניס בזו, ומוציא בזו; משמרת--שהיא מוציאה את היין, וקולטת את השמרים; ונפה--שהיא מוציאה את הקמח, וקולטת את הסולת

Avot 5:15

There are four types of listeners: "The sponge" absorbs everything, "the funnel" takes it in from one ear and lets it out the other, "the wine filter" (mashmeret) lets the good stuff through and retains only the junk, and "the sifter" lets the nonsense fall through and holds on to the best.

The intent of this blog is to share not wine but sediment: content-less bits of Torah which inevitably slip into limmud. Over my time studying under Avi uMori, I have occasioned to document some of the stories, jokes, and comical remarks in the Talmud and elsewhere with which our limmud is so rich and which keep the Talmidim awake and attentive. Be'ezrat Hashem, I hope to make them available here for any reader who wishes to enjoy them.

I'll start with a story my father is fond of sharing when certain speakers take the podium:

Once, in a small Ukrainian village, there was a member of the Jewish community with a bad habit of reporting on the community to the authorities. As a result, the Jewish members of the town wanted as little to do with him as possible. One year, he demanded of the Rabbi to allow him to act as ba'al toke'a on Rosh Hashana- to blow the Shofar for the whole Bet Kinesset to hear. The Rabbi refused, and the informant turned to the chief of police for help. The chief of police called in the Rabbi for questioning, and, trembling from head to toe, he came immediately.
The three of them sat down and the chief of police said, "Rabbi, my friend here says that you refuse to let him blow the shofar on Rosh Hashana. You wouldn't treat my good friend in such an ill manner, would you?"
"But, your honor," the Rabbi protested, "I suggested instead that he should blow shofar at the conclusion of our holiest day of the calendar, Yom Kippur!" (upon which hearing the shofar is not an actual mitzva).
The chief turned to his companion. "The Rabbi is right, Yom Kippur is definitely the most solemn day on your calendar. Why don't you want to blow on Yom Kippur instead?"
"No way!" The informer shouted. "He's trying to trick us! On Yom Kippur, we only blow one sound. On Rosh Hashana, we blow a hundred!"
"Idiot!" The police chief told him. "Once the shofar is in your hands, blow as many times as you want!"

Some speakers think that once the microphone is in their hands, they can speak for as long as they want. On that note, I will try to keep these posts short and sweet, and not waste away too much of the reader's precious time. I hope you enjoy these little sediments of the wine as much as I do.