Alcoholic flush

ירושלמי פסים פרק י הלכה א 

רבי יודה בי רבי אלעי שתי ארבעתי כסוי דלילי פיסחא וחזיק רישיה עד חגא חמתי' חדא מטרונה אפוי נהירין אמר' לי' סבא סבא חדא מן תלת מילין אית בך או שתיי חמר את או מלוה בריבית או את מגדל חזירים את אמר לה תיפח רוחה דהיא איתתא הדא מן אילין תלתי מילייא לית בי אלא אולפני שכיח לי דכתיב (קוהלת ח) חכמת אדם תאיר פניו

Yerushalmi Pesachim 10:1 

Ribbi Yehuda b. Ribbi Ilai would drink the four cups of wine of the Seder night and would experience migraines until Succot.
One day, a Roman baroness saw him after Pesach with heavy flushing in his face.
"Old man! Based on that glow, I deduce that you fall into one of the following three categories." the Sherlock Holmes wannabe told him. "You are either an alcoholic, or you are a moneylender who never had to stress about your parnassa, or you are a swine farmer who earns a ton by monopolizing the pork industry in Israel. Nothing else can bring such a glow to your face."
"Get lost!" he responded. "I am none of these things. Rather, my wisdom causes my glow, as the pasuk in Kohelet says, 'A person's wisdom will light up his face.'"

Ribbi Yehuda b. Ribbi Ilai likely suffered from an acetaldehyde dehydrogenase deficiency. 

Talmudic tips for prevention of neurodegenerative disease

הוריות דף יג ע"ב 

חמשה דברים משיבים את הלימוד פת פחמין וכל שכן פחמין עצמן והאוכל ביצה מגולגלת בלא מלח והרגיל בשמן זית והרגיל ביין ובשמים והשותה מים של שיורי עיסה ויש אומרים אף הטובל אצבעו במלח ואוכל הרגיל בשמן זית מסייע ליה לרבי יוחנן דאמר רבי יוחנן כשם שהזית משכח לימוד של שבעים שנה כך שמן זית משיב לימוד של שבעים שנה

Horayot 13b 

Five things that preserve one's memory: Eating bread baked over charcoal and all the more so actual charcoal (- Rash"i) [alternatively- wheaten bread and much more so wheat itself - Soncino Talmud translation], eating hard-boiled eggs without salt, frequent use of olive oil, wine and pleasant scents, and the leftover water from the baking of bread....

'Frequent use of olive oil' confirms what Ribbi Yochanan would say: Just as olives can make you forget seventy years worth of learning, olive oil can preserve seventy years worth of learning. 

Over the past few decades, much research has been put into Alzheimer's disease and its prevention. One of the most effective methods for preventing Alzheimer's disease was a special diet dubbed the MIND diet. It was found to reduce or delay the onset of Alzheimer's disease, even among individuals with a high genetic predisposition to developing it. Among the notable features of the mind diet is the exclusive use of olive oil, a glass of wine daily, and whole grain bread. 

Gross Anatomy

בכורות דף מה ע"א

מעשה בתלמידיו של ר' ישמעאל ששלקו זונה אחת שנתחייבה שריפה למלך בדקו ומצאו בה מאתים וחמשים ושנים אמר להם שמא באשה בדקתם שהוסיף לה הכתוב שני צירים ושני דלתות

Bechorot 45a 

There was once a prostitute who was sentenced to death by the king. Her cadaver was given over to the students of Ribbi Yishmael to corrode and perform osteological studies. After studying her bones, they concluded that there were 252 bones, and not 248 like the Mishnah in Massechet Ohalot (1:9) claims! When they reported this discrepancy to their teacher, he asked them, "Was it a woman which you dissected? A woman's pelvis does not ossify in the same manner that a man's does!"

It is worth noting that according to today's anatomists, the adult human only has 206 bones. A"A addresses this by quoting the Encylopedia HaIvrit, which explains that the Talmudic account of 248 was not meant to be an account of complete bones but rather of ossification centers. 

I would like to add a suggestion. Perhaps the difference lies in the definition of adulthood: anatomical adulthood is defined by the completion of ossification (which occurs at around 20 years of age) while Halachic adulthood is defined as 12 or 13 years of age (for females and males respectively) or the onset of pubic hair growth (if it occurs after that age). Anatomists would agree that at 13 years of age, there are somewhere between 270 and 206 bones in the body.

Polycephalic babies

מנחות דף לז ע"א

בעא מיניה פלימו מרבי מי שיש לו שני ראשים באיזה מהן מניח תפילין א"ל או קום גלי או קבל עלך שמתא אדהכי אתא ההוא גברא א"ל איתיליד לי ינוקא דאית ליה תרי רישי כמה בעינן למיתב לכהן

Menachot 37a

A student named Palimo was once bored in shiur, and randomly asked Ribbi, "If someone has two heads, on which one does he wear tefillin?" 

"Either shut up and listen or get out of my class!" Ribbi answered.

Moments later, a man entered the Bet Midrash. 

"I just had a son, and he has two heads! How much pidyon do I have to give the Cohen, five coins or ten?"

(Two headed embryos are more common in reptiles but have also been observed in humans and are likely caused by an over-expression of the Goosecoid gene.)

Bothering Rav

שבת קח.

שמואל וקרנא הוו יתבי אגודא דנהר מלכא חזינהו למיא דקא דלו ועכירי א"ל שמואל לקרנא גברא רבה קאתי ממערבא וחייש במעיה וקא דלו מיא לאקבולי אפיה קמיה זיל תהי ליה אקנקניה אזל אשכחיה לרב א"ל מניין שאין כותבין תפילין אלא על גבי עור בהמה טהורה א"ל דכתיב (שמות יג) למען תהיה תורת ה' בפיך מן המותר בפיך מנין לדם שהוא אדום שנאמר (מלכים ב ג) ויראו מואב מנגד את המים אדומים כדם מניין למילה שבאותו מקום נאמר כאן ערלתו ונאמר להלן ערלתו מה להלן דבר שעושה פרי אף כאן דבר שעושה פרי אימא לבו דכתיב (דברים י) ומלתם את ערלת לבבכם אימא אזנו דכתיב (ירמיהו ו) הנה ערלה אזנם דנין ערלתו תמה מערלתו תמה ואין דנין ערלתו תמה מערלת שאינה תמה א"ל מאי שמך קרנא אמר ליה יהא רעוא דתיפוק ליה קרנא בעיניה לסוף עייליה שמואל לביתיה אוכליה נהמא דשערי וכסא דהרסנא ואשקייה שיכרא ולא אחוי ליה בית הכסא כי היכי דלישתלשל לייט רב ואמר מאן דמצערן לא לוקמוה ליה בני וכן הוה

Shabbat 108a

Shemuel and Karna were chilling on the bank of the river Malcha. They saw that the waters were rising and turning brown.
Shemuel said to Karna, "A great man is coming to town, and he has a stomach virus. The waters are rising in his honor. Go figure out what his deal is." So Karna looked into it, and met Rav, who had come to visit the town.
He started asking him questions to figure out what his deal is.
"How do we know that we can only use kosher animals for tefillin?" Karna asked Rav.
"We know it from the pasuk says, 'So that God's name will be present in your mouth.' Things that can go in your mouth are appropriate for writing God's name upon." Rav told him.
"How do we know that blood is red?" (Rashi explains he was asking about Nidda blood, which varies in color and Halacha.)
"The people of Moav saw the  blood and it had turned as red as blood."
"How do we know that berit mila is supposed to be done 'down there' and not somewhere else?"
"It says 'orla' by mila and it says 'orla' by fruit trees. Just like that kind of 'orla' produces fruit, so too, the 'orla' of mila is done in a place that produces offspring."
"Okay, but how do you know to draw a parallel from there? Maybe its talking about the 'orla' of the heart or the 'orla' of the ear? The word 'orla' is used in both of those contexts too!
"We prefer to draw a parallel from trees because the word 'orlato' is used in both contexts, as opposed to 'orlat' which is used in the context of the heart and the ear. Look buddy, what's your name?"
"My name is Karna."
"Karna? May it be His will that a horn (keren) sprouts between your eyes!"
Later, Shemuel invited Rav over for dinner. In an effort to cure him of his stomach virus, he fed him barley bread and fish pie (Soncino press translation), and lots of beer. He didn't let Rav use the bathroom, so the foods can properly cure his stomach virus and he would release it all healthily at the right time.
Rav got really annoyed that he wasn't being allowed to use the bathroom. He cursed and said, "Whoever is paining me like this should never have sons!"
His curse came true, and Shemuel never had any sons.
(As an apologetic measure for this curse, he would always let Shemuel enter the room first from then on. - Bava Kama 80b)

Medicine, Prayer, and Hell

קידושין פב.

 טוב שברופאים לגיהנם

Kiddushin 82a

The best of physicians go to hell.

 This surprising line from the mishnah has already been heavily discussed. Conveniently enough, the most popular Jewish doctor and Talmudist, haRambam, does not have this line as part of his text of the Mishnah at the end of Masechet Kiddushin.

Several authors have taken this line pretty literally. The Kaf haChaim (Phalachi) in Siman 21 argues that medicine is one of two fields that an observant Jew may not enter (the other being a strip-club musician). However, most writers have found ways to reinterpret it. A"A shared one with me a few days ago, which I wanted to share:

The numerical value of "tov" is 17. The Mishnah is alluding to those doctors who only pray 17 berachot in their amida instead of the prescribed 18 berachot. (This assertion must have been made before the 19th beracha was added.) Those doctors who cut out the beracha of "Refa'enu Hashem veNeraphe" because they're afraid to lose their clientele will wind up in the depths of hell. 

Goats and Gangsters

בבא קמא פ. 

ת"ר מעשה בחסיד אחד שהיה גונח מלבו ושאלו לרופאים ואמרו אין לו תקנה עד שינק חלב רותח משחרית לשחרית והביאו לו עז וקשרו לו בכרעי המטה והיה יונק ממנה משחרית לשחרית לימים נכנסו חביריו לבקרו כיון שראו אותה העז קשורה בכרעי המטה חזרו לאחוריהם ואמרו לסטים מזויין בביתו של זה ואנו נכנסין אצלו?!

Bava Kama 80a:

It was taught: there once was a pious person who had a heart condition. He sought instruction from the physicians and was told that the only remedy was to drink fresh milk each morning. They brought him a goat and tied it to his nightstand and he would drink from its milk each morning. A few days later, his peers came to visit him. When they saw the goat tied to his nightstand, they backed out slowly and said, "this house is full of gangsters and we're expected to come in?"